Is there something wrong with my son that he doesn't keep friends long and never really gets called for play dates?

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WorriedMomi... asks:

My son is 9 years old. There are lots of kids in our neighborhood in his grade. I have recently noticed that they all play with each other and do not ask him to play with them. He only gets calls for playdates once in a while from kids at school. When he does have schoolmate playdates I am the one who does the calling and sets up the playdate at my house but then no reciprocation. He does play with a few kids from other areas of our neighborhood because my husband and I are friends with the parents. Lately these children are becoming friends with the these local kids and are getting closer, having playdates and sleepovers. My son is being left out and although he acts like it doesn't bother him, I can tell that it does. I told my husband I don't want to continue friendships with our friends anymore because it breaks my heart to hear all about these playdates and sleepovers that my son is being left out of. Is there something wrong with me that I get so mad and feel so sorry for him? Am I wrong for not wanting to continue friendships with our friends? How would I look if I mentioned something to my friends about this? I don't expect my son to be mr. popularity but I do want him to enjoy his childhood and have a few good friends who at least want to play with him. I had a lot of the same issues growing up and there were times I just wanted to crawl under a shell and die. I don't want this for him. Please help with some advice!! Thanks

In Topics: Friendships and peer relationships

> 60 days ago

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jindy writes:

I have been experiencing the same exact problem for several years and my son is 12. It is getting worse. I have tried taking kids to movies, having swim parties, taking kids to DQ, etc and they go but NEVER does anyone call my son. My son is a straight a student, is very kind friendly and outgoing. Teachers LOVE him and have sent us emails how they have never met such a great kid. I don't understand it and it has worried me for a couple years now. Tonight I finally found out that it is bothering my son as he told me no one likes him or will like him and he was crying. My friends also talk openly in front of me about all the parties their son goes to and my son who is supposedly his friend is never included. Has never been invited to sleep overs, never gets invited to birthday parties, etc. It's horrible. He knows all these people get to go and he doesn't. He also realizes where he sits on the middle school food chain and it isn't at the top. He wished we could move so he could get a fresh start. Help me please someone because this is killing me to see the most wonderful boy in the world hurting like this.........

> 60 days ago

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