We're all programmed to want to be liked. That's because humans are social creatures, we live in groups, and waaaaaaay back, when we lived in hostile environments, our very survival depended on our acceptance by the tribe. If the group was "displeased" with us, they could boot us out of the cave, in which case, we'd probably die. So... we're all people pleasers to one degree or another. It's not necessarily a bad thing.

It sounds like you may be feeling a bit embarrassed by the lengths to which your son has gone at times to win peer approval. Part of his trying "too hard" may be a lack of confidence in himself. It might be helpful for you to pay special attention to the meta-messages you send to him as you interact with him day to day. Are you more likely to encourage him, praise him, and catch him in the act of doing something right? OR are you more likely to be correcting him, admonishing him, or pointing out how he has messed up?

While you watch the way you relate to him, I'd also suggest that you talk with his teacher and see, from her perspective, how he functions, socially in class.
Allowing his interests to lead him to activities in which he'll "shine" is another excellent way to help a child build self-esteem and self-confidence.