How Parents Can Support Gifted Children (continued)

In the preschool and primary years, mixed-aged groupings are beneficial, as long as the gifted child is not the oldest in the group. Gifted, creative boys are often held back in the primary years because of so-called "immaturity," the inability to socialize with age peers who are less developmentally advanced. When a 5-year-old boy with an 8-year-old mind cannot relate to 5-year-olds, nothing is gained by having him repeat a grade: he is then a 6-year-old with a 9-year-old mind trying to relate to 5-year-olds! The best solution is to find him true peers, boys his own age who are intellectually advanced. Retention is not recommended.

Parent Advocacy

Gifted children need strong, responsible advocates, and parent groups can make a difference. It takes persistence of large groups of parents to assure that provisions for gifted children are kept firmly in place. Parents of children who are gifted need opportunities to share parenting experiences with each other, and parent groups can provide a place where that can happen. It is important for parents of any children with special needs to meet with the teachers early in the school year. When parents and teachers work together, appropriate programs can be developed and problems can be caught early. It is helpful for parents to offer to assist their child's teacher by making or locating supplemental materials, helping in the classroom or library, offering expertise to small groups of students, or finding others who can provide other enrichment experiences. Effective parents stay involved in their children's education and informed about gifted education in general. When a teacher makes a special effort to understand or assist a gifted child, a note to the teacher or to the principal is generally appreciated.

Conclusion

The key to raising gifted children is respect: respect for their uniqueness, respect for their opinions and ideas, respect for their dreams. Gifted children need parents who are responsive and flexible, who will go to bat for them when they are too young to do so for themselves. It is painful for parents to watch their children feeling out of sync with others, but it is unwise to emphasize too greatly the importance of fitting in. Children get enough of that message in the outside world. At home, children need to know that their uniqueness is cherished and that they are appreciated as persons just for being themselves.

Additional Reading

An annotated list of books, journals, and other reading material can be obtained from CEC/ERIC at the address listed below, or from one of the following organizations:

The Association for the Gifted
c/o Ella May Gogel, Parent representative
2216 Main Street
Cedar Falls, IA 50613

Supporting Emotional Needs of Gifted, Inc. (SENG)
405 White Hall
Kent State University
Kent, OH 44242-0001
330.672.4450
E-mail:seng@www.educ.kent.edu
http://seng.educ.kent.edu/

References

Feldhusen, J. F. (1992). Early admission and grade advancement for young gifted learners. Gifted Child Today, 15 (2), 45-49.

Morelock, M. (1992) Giftedness: The view from within. Understanding Our Gifted, 4 (3), 1, 11-15.

Silverman, L. K., & Leviton, L. P. (1991). Advice to parents in search of the perfect program. Gifted Child Today, 14 (6), 31-34.

ERIC Digests are in the public domain and may be freely reproduced and disseminated, but please acknowledge your source. This publication was prepared with funding from the U.S. Department of Education, Office of Educational Research and Improvement, under Contract No. RI88062207. The opinions expressed in this report do not necessarily reflect the positions or policies of OERI or the Department of Education.