Maintaining Harmony at Home (continued)

Assure your children that whatever they were longing to do instead of getting in the car will be there for them when they return. Visualizing what will happen, or not happen, as a result of their action, or inaction, is often a successful way to get results. Nobody wants to disappoint the team or coach by being late! Also effective, although militaristic sounding, are one word commands: "Shoes-Car-Please" convey all the instructions they need. Not much decoding is required!

One parent wrote me with a great idea for helping her son to get ready on time, every morning. They sat down together and agreed on the chores that needed to be completed, and in what order. Then, they color-coded those chores: Blue (1) Eat breakfast, Red (2) Get dressed, Yellow (3) Brush teeth, and so on. Each morning, she would hand her son his set of cards, each with Velcro tabs, which he would take with him to each task and stick them to the dresser, mirror, etc., wherever the chore had taken place. He quickly learned the morning routine and was able to complete the chores, without distraction, in time for them to leave for school each day. You could play with this idea and create two sets of cards, each numbered, then place the #1 card next to what you want your child to do (perhaps, on the hairbrush, next to the bar of soap, or under the toothbrush). They search for their numbered cards, in a row, completing the obvious task as the go, then "turn in" their two sets of cards indicating they are ready to go! Perhaps a timer could be implemented and the whole thing could be a game?

Make it fun so the job gets done!

The right hemisphere enjoys absurdity and thrives on humor. So, use it everywhere! A silly, singsong voice or foreign accent engages visual-spatial children and gets them participating. In our home, we try to present chores that need doing, or some other task they dread, in a British or Australian accent. Pretty soon, the kids are mocking the accent as they complete the task. Everyone is silly about it, but the job gets done. Background music and lots of dancing work great, too! Vacuuming isn't such toil with The Beatles blaring in the background. Make daily routines a big production! What's big and fun and noisy can make chores and other dreaded rituals much less drudgery. Even Mary Poppins understood the importance of song and silliness to "help the medicine go down" or tidy the nursery!

Recently, my dear friend and her husband were stranded in a snowstorm and had to seek refuge in our home. We had about 45 minutes notice to clean house, make a fresh bed and scrub the bathrooms! We gobbled down the rest of our dinner and set to work. With the radio blaring, we each set to a different chore. By the time our guests had arrived, not only was the house clean, but the boys had also constructed a "check-in" desk out of a cardboard box, complete with paper computer and mouse, door keys to slide into paper "locks" on their door, a welcome basket of fruit waiting in their room and room service options available for them! We had such fun anticipating their arrival that the chore of cleaning and preparing the house in a big hurry was just another necessary step in all the fun.