The Many Meanings of Family and the Role of Fathers (continued)

Critics of the essential-father viewpoint often argue that this view often ignores or minimizes the impact of more important variables — for instance, that the many negative effects on children attributed to fatherlessness may have much more to do with the fact that such children typically suffer more severe poverty than those with two parents. In addition it is unclear whether it is mothers' or fathers' involvement that is critical to children, because increased mother involvement typically accompanies increased father involvement. The critics also believe that stepfathers are unfairly blamed for the impact on children of stressors that predate their arrival, such as the marital conflict that may have preceded divorce, or the impact of a significant drop in socioeconomic status, relocation and loss of friends, change of school, and other disruptions when biological fathers do not fulfill their financial responsibilities following divorce.

Some conclusions about the debate

Both points of view agree that what fathers typically do is quite important for their children. Whether fathering skills are entirely learned or have some biological basis, it appears that responsible parenting figures other than the biological father can learn and enact those behaviors with children.

An open-minded review of the existing literature suggests that parenting roles are interchangeable, that neither mothers nor fathers are unique or essential. What the research (Amato & Rivera, l996) suggests is that children do best when they have a consistent, caring relationship with at least one responsible adult and that optimal outcomes for children are associated with a particular cluster of parental behaviors including:

• showing affection
• being responsive to children's needs
• encouraging children to do well
• giving every day assistance
• providing supervision
• exercising noncoercive discipline
• serving as role models of positive behaviors

In sum, the mental health and well-being of children may simply be dependent on the presence or absence of a number of variables that have a powerful impact on children's lives: economic well-being, access to educational resources within and outside the family and encouragement to achieve, an involved parent or parents, and absence of destructive conflict between the parents.

References and Related Books

Amato, P. R. & Rivera, F. (1994).
Paternal involvement and children's behavior problems
Journal of Marriage and the Family , 61, 375-384.

Fatherless America: Confronting Our Most Urgent Social Problem
D. Blankenhorn
Basic Books 1995

Lytton, H. & Romney, D. M. (1991).
Parents' differential socialization of boys and girls. A meta-
analysis. Psychological Bulletin , 109, 267-296.

Life Without Father: Compelling New Evidence That Fatherhood and Marriage are Indispensable for the Good of Children and Society
D. Popenoe
Harvard University Press 1996

Silverstein, L. B. & Auerbach, C. F. (1999).
Deconstructing the essential father. American Psychologist ,
54, 397-407.
In the Name of the Family: Rethinking Family Values in the Postmodern Age
J. Stacey
Boston: Beacon Press 1996