Raising Great Teen Communicators

Speaking so your teen will listen. Listening to more than your teen's words

Developing open, effective communication with your child is important at every phase of your child's life, but particularly during the teenage years. Teens spend a lot of their time outside the home, with friends, at school and involved in after school activities. Sharing opinions, ideas, and information with your teen is a good way to keep the lines of communication open.

Tips for Communicating with Your Teenager

• Be actively interested in what your teen is saying and listen carefully to what he is saying. This shows him that what he says matters and is important to you.

• Ask questions while your teen is sharing something with you. For example, “what happened when…?” or “how did you fix that problem…?”

• Listen to your teen's emotions, not just the content of what he is saying, and acknowledge those emotions by asking him how the situation made him feel.

• Talk with your teen, not at him . This shows them that you are interested in having a conversation with him. It is also a great opportunity for you to share your opinions and ideas, which your teen may be looking for but does not want to ask.

• Ask your teen questions that require more than a yes or no answer . For example, don't just ask, “Did you have a good day today?” Ask, “What did you do today?”

• Take advantage of great opportunities to talk to your teen. For example, in the car, your teen may be more willing to bring up something to discuss. With your eyes on the road, your teen does not have to make eye contact, which can take away the discomfort he may be feeling.

• Talk later if need be. If the car drive does not give enough time to fully discuss the matter, set a time later in the day to get together with your teenager to complete the discussion and solve any issues.