A Healthy Balance of Choices

Giving your child no choices at all could incite eventual rebellion – yet giving too many choices might not be the best idea either. Beware the danger of choice overload, and how you can strike a healthy balance for your child. 

What You Need to Know

Children given clear expectations know the consequences of not living up to them, and make deliberate choices about whether to be obedient. Pleading with your child puts him in control, resulting in a “child-centered home.” A healthy home should be: 

• parent directed
• family oriented
• outward focused 

This is not only important in clarifying familial roles and your authority, or demanding respect from your child. Clear boundaries and expectations also make your child feel more safe, stable and secure. Your child's healthy mentality depends on your being in control. 

While giving a child no choices at all poses danger of eventual rebellion, giving too many choices in too many areas can diminish your authority by setting up the unrealistic expectation that one can choose in every aspect of life. Offering no more than two or three reasonable choices is usually adequate for demonstrating that your child's contributions matter to you. 

• parental role modeling
• hearing results of potential choices explained before making decisions
• being coached after making the wrong choices
• being praised for making good choices
• being taught to realize when there is no choice involved

For more on this topic, see the complete article:

http://www.education.com/reference/article/teaching-kids-make-wise-choices/